Reminiscense or birthday jitters

It is my birthday next week and I started looking back on the last year. I’ve been through quite a turmoil of emotions. Gosh, this sounds dramatic, I know. And I am hoping I am not the only one doing this – reminiscing -, it makes me sound like an old woman looking back on her life… ha ha. It is nothing that serious, I promise. Being on my own and trying to stand my ground in this big city does that to me.

But I did think about the issues of the heart, my family and my friends. The biggest issue for me is, that I have lost my best friend. We had a big fall-out. It started with a minor ‘miscommunication’, isn’t it always like that? And it escalated with a big bang style massive argument. Now it feels as if too much damage was done and it cannot be mended. This makes me incredibly sad, it feels like loosing a sister. Is this the way life goes?

The second biggest issue: men. Of course! 😉 I have met a couple of very nice guys, even though unfortunately it did not work out. But it lets me hope, that there are more of those good men out there (remind me please where exactly I’ll have to look!?). I have met some guys I do not want to waste any more breath on (you have read about some examples), and I am intending on staying away from those in the coming year. Wish me luck!

And then there is my family. It is not always easy, and the saying is true: You can chose your friends, but not your family… They live in a different country. Not too far away, but I still have to hop on a plane to see them. I know, there is all sorts of wonderful technology, but I still miss them – sometimes a girl just needs a hug from her mum.

I am not moaning, I promise! But honestly, sometimes life is a bitch (excuse my language)! 😉

And then I think back on all the great stuff that happened in the past 12 months: I went on some amazing and truly inspiring holidays, I met lovely people who showed me a different side if the world and made me appreciate small things, I have made some lovely friends who I would not want to miss anymore, I have a great job which challenges me and where I can thrive. And last but not least, I experienced glimmers of love, that makes me go on and not loose hope that at some point (soon, pretty please) it will hit me, only this time with full force, in a good way.

I am a lucky girl, really. With good and bad times, but I am still standing and I am still smiling. Even though sometimes life throws me a curveball, I am still in command of the game. I am not sure if I am looking forward to my birthday or not, but to be honest – age is just a number, and I feel so much younger than that! Here is to a great und even better new year! Cheers!

PS: I know the article is not about dating, strictly speaking, but it is about me, and hopefully some of the ‘guys-stuff’ makes a little more sense now… 😉 And if not, you’re as confused as I am, even though I am not sure if that is any consolation. Ha ha!


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