Second date anxiety 

Well, the week did get better. Phew, I am a little relieved! I had a lovely first date. He was very nice, charming, witty and funny. We had lots to talk about and – most importantly – we will meet again! Yey!

Now the anxious wait for the second date starts. Maybe it is only me, but I am convinced that the second date is a crucial one. At a first date I have no great expectations, I am open and waiting to be surprised. But after that a picture starts forming in my head, and I am hoping it will play out in this or that way. So a second date either confirms that picture and I still like the guy, or it crushes it into pieces. Hence, normally I am quite nervous at a second date.

Tut tut, I know. There is me talking about being yourself etc., but it is something I cannot stop. Is it a female thing, that all of a sudden the ‘head cinema’ starts with its own dynamics? Is it only us girls who think about if and when and and the whole range of could/would/might? Even though I do not intend to act like this, and I actually know it is a little ridiculous, my mind is tumbling with thoughts like ‘he lives in X, so I could use the tube back home or into work in the morning’ or ‘he likes playing tennis too, so we could start playing together’ or ‘he has three siblings, and nieces and nephews. Great, I love big families.’… I catch myself getting way ahead of myself and have to reign myself in, or a good friend puts my head straight again.

So what do I take from this: I have to stay grounded and try to take one step at a time, and I have to trust my friends when they say I am going a little mad. And, to stay positive and look forward to the second date. After all it is only a stepping stone to date number three, and that is out of the ‘danger zone’. 😉


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